The school run is hands down, the best place to mum-watch. We get to observe all types of mums; chatty mums, moody mums, dressed up mums, dressed down mums, energetic mums and run down mums. I’ve been all of them so trust me, there’s zero judgement over here - I get it! We usually end up gravitating towards the ones that share a similar look, (more specifically) energy to ourselves.
What is it about the mums that we judge that jars us? Is it that they’re just too perky for the morning school run? Or that they look far too put together for you to truly relate to? Or Is it that they seem to have a life outside of being a taxi service, so you feel they can’t possibly be a committed member of the HOOD (Motherhood)?
I know how desperate I used to feel in comparison to other mums, I felt like I was constantly playing catch up but never quite reaching that parental Nirvana and that caused me to be very closed off to other mums. I was so bogged down with my kids needs, they felt like a literal weight on me and I had no time, strength or vision to do anything just for me. I remember once seeing a picture a friend had posted, she had the same amount of kids as me and she had on lipstick and earrings… LIPSTICK and EARRINGS y’know!! How the heck had she found time to do that - I was baffled, suspicious (and kind of outraged)!
Once I swallowed my pride and asked that very same friend “How?” I started to realise that it’s a very purposeful process - continuing to think of and look after You. Once we have kids, as women some kind of crazy conditioning kicks in. Unless you purposefully and physically fight it, your essence can get sucked out of you and in it’s place is some zombie-like, Stepford wife!
That’s when the competitiveness kicks in and we can be really unkind to each other without realising that we’re all dealing with the same conditioning. It would make so much more sense just to support each other… My struggle as a mum is going to be different to yours and vice versa - don’t judge me, help me. There’s so much strength to be found in vulnerability but ladies, we need to build up that trust amongst each other for it to flow more freely.
I’m a little bit on my soap box with this one but it’s important - women are losing themselves to be “good” mums and it doesn’t need to be that way… I challenge you, on the next school run, reach out, grab a coffee, pay a compliment, even a smile, let them know - “I see you sis and You Still Got It…”
Sherine x
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