This was the name of our WhatsApp group.. Ok, it started as “Nights Out” then we realised we’d been wildly optimistic and renamed it “Occasional Nights out LOL! We’ve now just settled on “Gal Dem” which suits us fine.
As a busy wife, mum, person, how often do you go out on average? Once a week, once a month or twice a year? It’s easy to turn down invites, it’s much safer/warmer/cheaper to stay indoors but how does it affect you mentally… If you’re totally good with it then you’re good, but if you feel a little lonely at times, disconnected and unseen - keep reading.
When my marriage crashed, one of the first things I did was assemble my Friend-Avengers! These were women that I knew I could trust, would keep it 100% real with me, but would also protect me and hold me in my time of need.
Theres “S.B (Social Butterfly’) who we joke is the Queen of Outside but is guaranteed to drop everything and be the first one on the scene in a crisis.
There’s “The Finisher” who will finish an argument/discussion/person with minimal words, but sees and feels everything. The most empathetic heart I know.
Then there’s “My Twin” who is basically a wonderful version of myself! Our lives and energy run parallel in so many ways it’s ridiculous, we just get each other.
I was a hermit for many years, used the kids as my go-to excuse and was quite happy for my ex to accept invitations and represent by himself. It was just too much and since my confidence was shot, the anxiety about what to wear and how I would look was not something I wanted to deal with.
As a result, I lost contact with a lot of friends. They probably thought I was being snobby, or lazy but the truth was, I didn’t feel I had anything to contribute to the friendship. S.B, The Finisher and My Twin were the ones I felt I could truly share my heart with and start building a true friendship from the ground up and it has been transformative!
When like minded women get together it is MAGICAL. The love, support, laughter, honesty and strength you can draw from each other is unmatched and I believe it literally saved my life. “Going out” is so much more than just getting dressed up to stand in a bar or sit in a restaurant. Don’t get me wrong, I love buying clothes now because I know they’ll be put to use when we step out - that part is fun! I love being admired by men when they experience our Queen energy and attempt to catch our vibe - they’re usually rejected lol! But the thing I love most is just Us. Going out with friends is therapy for me, it is Self-Care. I get to relax, put my guard down, take my mum hat off and just be Sherine and the love and appreciation I get back lifts me up and I feel re-energised to go again.
Don’t underestimate connection, it is a vital human need. Pull out your phone and fling a date in your WhatsApp group - it’s time for a Night Out!
Sherine x
Comments