How do over 40s date?…. No seriously, this is not rhetorical (I’m asking for a friend)
I’ve tried a few ways and can’t say I’ve cracked it yet, it’s been a learning process to say the least. Sometimes fun, sometimes scary, often times hilarious giving my girls plenty of GIF material in the group chat!
Let me give you a breakdown of the various avenues I’ve pursued -
DATING APPS
I convinced myself that as cringe as it seemed, this was the way forward! The way all the gorgeous, cool, eligible men were meeting women. It wasn’t. I signed up to Tinder for a week but found it much too young and sexualised (plus I got caught by one of my ex-husbands friends - Doh!)
Bumble was a little better and I actually had some decent flirtations on there and a date. Although one dude decided it would be cute to call without warning… needless to say, once he heard my x4 kids creating their usual, unfiltered mayhem in the background I never heard from him again lol!
I’m currently on Melanin Matchmaker but I gotta be honest - I go on it like I go on the Zara app, to browse, put things in my cart and then not commit to “purchase”.
CHATTING UP A STRANGER
Yes I did this (and would do it again)!
Picture it - Morning school run, yesterdays clothes, no bra, no lip balm, “Dry and Dusty” is how I would describe my look on that particular morning. A corner was taken too tightly and the tyre burst!… Cue Green Flag recovery.
When the van turned up I could only laugh in disbelief when I saw the driver - a tall, well built brother! Obviously has a job, obviously good with his hands and here I was looking like I lived in my car. Spurred on by my girls (via group chat) I shot my shot, told him “don’t worry about what you see before you…”
I’m sure he thought I was bonkers but was also intrigued. We went out and had a great time.
SET UP BY MUTUAL FRIEND
Ok so technically this one has not happened yet, for some reason this avenue makes me the most shy/nervous. Maybe because it’s people that I know from a distance, which means they also know me from a distance… What if they’re not really on it and are just doing it as a favour for the mutual friend? My ego struggles with this and for this reason I’ve put it off. Please get in touch and let me know if it’s been a positive experience for you!
GETTING TO KNOW SOMEONE YOU KNOW
This is where I currently am at. Getting to know someone I see through the circumstances of life on a fairly regular basis.
-Physical attraction - CHECK
-Mutual admiration - CHECK
-Flirty banter - CHECK
I kinda like it here… It keeps me sharp and there’s no pressure, it’s just going where it’s going.
I’m old enough to know that the very thing you’re looking for usually appears when you’re not looking for it, for this reason I’m very conscious about pouring love and attention into myself. That way, when “He” does make an appearance - I’m ready. Confident, joyful, fulfilled and totally aware of how dope I truly am!
I’d love to hear your experiences and compare notes - get in touch and we’ll have a giggle!
You Still Got It
Sherine x
Comments